Difficult marriages always lack desire for sexual intimacy with their partners. If the wife is not attracted to her husband, it is difficult to get sexually aroused. The sexual intimacy of women works differently from that of men. While men get sexually aroused simply by physical and visual stimuli, it is not the case with women. Women need to feel affection and love from their partner to be responsive towards sexual desires. When a woman allows her partner to invade her during intercourse, it’s not just physical invasion but also emotional and spiritual. Wives who feel loved and protected by their husband experience intense pleasure, whereas women who don’t feel secured, experience sex to be violation of their body and mind.
Having difficulties in sexual life must be shared with the husband. One must inform their partner about the steps taken to improve their love making. It will prevent the partner from assuming that wife is not interested in sex. He will not have the feeling of insecurity and his bitterness will be removed. If the husband does not agree with wife’s decisions and wishes, then the help of the counselor must be taken. This will lead to happy married sexual life in future.
Women should educate themselves and get interested in sex. Inhibition in learning new sexual desires prevents women from getting aroused. Women with past history of sexual trauma are not often interested in sex. If the earlier sexual life was resentful, women will inhibit in present life also. In the case of sexual abuse or trauma, one should take professional help in order to have healthy sexual life in future. Even hormone imbalance in women churns out the desire for sex. If one is suffering from sexual dysfunction, a physician should be immediately consulted so that women can enjoy sexual life completely. Not reaching orgasm, lack of vaginal lubrication and painful sexual intercourse prevents women from having sex and even if consumption of any medicine creating hindrance, should consult her doctor immediately.
Usually it is the husband who always initiates as wife is reluctant to have sex. This can result in unhelpful pattern of life. It may happen that wife does not want to have sex but is forced by husband. Therefore, husband’s feeling of insecurity for wife’s inhibition towards sex should be removed by talking to him. He should be asked to wait till his wife asks him for sexual intercourse. In this way the woman will not be pressurized for sex and will prevent avoidance from husband. Making changes in sex life is usually not easy but one should not completely stop sexual relationship as it will not only hamper the marriage but also both the partners and will lead to frustration. Hence, if the wife is not interested in sex, husband should cooperate and understand the feelings and situation of his wife. Similarly, wife should not always prevent her husband from having sex and consider his feelings. A healthy sex life is the basic ground for good and successful marriage.